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[brackets] below is mine – Ray

From M.

My daughter —
This is very hard to discuss as I am still unable to process what has happened. I have no real answers. I have suspicions.
Ever since I came out on the UFOs are real subject I have felt somewhat targeted. I wasn’t worried about it for sometime…because I am small potatoes. As time has passed and I became even more public about it and got involved with more high profile people like Clifford Stone, some pretty strange things have happened.
I fought long and hard against the foreclosure and had 2 large law firms against me, using very underhanded tactics. When I finally threw in the towel and decided that the only thing we could do in the best interest of my family, was to give up and move where I felt there was opportunity, I was hopeful that things would get better for us.
Then one week after we moved our Mom had a stroke and died. The docs think it was all the stress of the move. I agreed as it was very traumatic for us all. The move was very chaotic.
Are these things factors? I have been very vocal about Wells Fargo being unconcerned about the harm they do.
My daughter did struggle some with depression and NYC is just a stressful place. Although she loved it I did observe her health declining. The last couple of years she was having very bad digestive issues. Otherwise she was doing well in her work in IT. And she and her partner had started the side business in event planning and DJing. She seemed to be enjoying life and had a lot to look forward to. She saw this as bringing unity through music.
So what happened was a complete shock. When I went to NYC, to see about her final arrangements, I had a lot of questions. Some important ones were answered. others were not.
Early in the morning of Feb. 7th she leapt from her 31st story apartment window and fell 250 feet to another rooftop.

[She fell from her 31st story apartment window , 250 feet to another rooftop. We don’t know if she leapt.]
No note, no warning.
She was on the phone with her partner, he was trying desperately  [what does this mean?] to get to her. He arrived minutes too late.
She had had an earlier argument with another friend that apparently upset her, but from what I could glean this was not a life shattering argument. But she was upset and x was trying to get her to not take it so hard.
I had only spoken with Jonathan on the phone and did not know him well. I wondered was this really what happened. I was able to have a long conversation with the head investigating detective and he showed me still from the video surveillance from her building. He proved the timeline was that Jonathan was only minutes away when this happened.
I have learned a great deal about him since as he helped me do all the hard stuff in planning the memorial and handle her business, etc. He is studying to be a constitutional lawyer. He has filed many suits against the TSA. He even helped Andrea file a suit for civil rights abuse against the NYC police. A suit she had just won and was the reason for the argument with the other friend earlier that evening.
So could she have been a targeted individual as well? I have to consider that possibility.
I also learned she was on too many prescription drugs. Another factor I must consider. She was on an anti anxiety med, a med for depression, an addictive pain med, and a strong sleep aid. All with side effects that could be a factor.
I know there is a GWEN tower within a mile of her location. I have studied on psychotronic weapons, voice to skull or “voice of god” tech. Is this a possibility? Could be.
You see not only did I lose my Mom last June. Within a couple of weeks I also lost a very close friend. We had just spoken on the phone one night when the next morning I get a call from her sister and she had been involved in a fatal head on collision on her way to work that morning.
Within another week I learned that another very close friend who was involved with CSETI in the very beginning and was the best friend and caretaker of Shari Adamek when she died of the cancer given to her and Doctor Greer; was herself suddenly diagnosed with a very aggressive cancer which took her life in a couple of weeks.
And then this happened to my daughter. All of these deaths in such a short time really aroused my suspicions.
Now to the present. I suppose you heard of the explosion and building collapse in Manhattan this week? Coincidentally (or not) this was within one short block of Y’s partner’s apartment. And within a hundred yards of another of her very best friends. He had started a Go Fund Me to help me pay for getting to NYC, her memorial and shipping her possessions home. Another suspicious thing.
So although I have no way to prove anything perhaps other than the drug interactions and side effects I have a lot of suspicions and cannot just accept that she suddenly decided on her own that life was not worth living. I had just spoken to her a few days before for a couple of hours on the phone and she seemed fine. She was seeing a therapist and I spoke with him, he had seen her that week and said she seemed “fine”.
I have never felt so devastated. I mean I thought losing out home was bad…but the losses continued culminating in the worst lose of all, my beautiful daughter. Who also, by the way, had attended protests against the NSA as well and had even been interviewed at one of these events in Washington DC by the news.
I am still having a very hard time with it all. I never knew such pain existed as to lose your child. It is a hole that cannot be filled. I will never be the same.
Today I did finally post something on my own wall on Facebook about the dangers of the pharmaceutical drugs.
And I am about to post one about former employees of Bank of America blowing the whistle on their illegal foreclosure practices.
I have decided I must carry on the fight in her name, in all their names. It is the right thing to do even if ultimately I lose everything.


From Ray

I am also suspicious. That is my feeling.

You need to be cosmic now. No one survives. We are here for a brief time in this particular incarnation, and even a more brief time in the company of any one else. I’ve had to let
go of my son. He is fine, but doesn’t need to communicate much now, and that hurt for a while, and even made me angry, but now I don’t think about him. He is another
friend out there somewhere.

Of course there is no such thing as death. Your daughters passing first, relieved her of missing you when you died 🙂

Buddha noticed there are four unavoidable sufferings. Coming into a world, leaving it, all the sickness and decay in between and SEPARATION FROM LOVED ONES.

Everything is attached with velcro.

So, please be cosmic. She still exists. It is nuts to not stay in communication with her and not send her your love and keep receiving hers. It is shock for her too!

It is like your teeth, here today, gone tomorrow.

I am not trivializing your pain, I am just saying that we have the capacity to prop ourselves up by remembering the big perspective, and that is what wisdom teachings are for, so
just reminding you of what you already know, as we all do need support.

keep writing

Join the discussion One Comment

  • John in Seattle says:


    So sad to read of the loss. As a parent I can only imagine the pain of the loss of a child. Blessings on your path to healing.

    You’re right to be suspicious of pharmaceutical drugs as a possible cause of your daughter’s death. Far too little is said about the dangers of drugs, especially those for mental health. We are prevented from knowing many of the dangers of these drugs because only 1 percent of their long-term side effects come to the FDA’s attention, according to an FDA official quoted by Joseph Glenmullen, M.D., author of Prozac Backlash. FDA approval is based only on short-term studies and even then the drug companies have virtual veto power over all studies. Therefore the unsuspecting public becomes the real guinea pigs for testing drugs.

    Currently 70% of Americans take one drug of some kind and 50% take more than one and drugs are the go-to solution of most doctors trained by drug-company-supported medical schools. In the world of mental health the ONLY solution besides counseling of some kind.

    My girl friend is a doctor that specializes in getting people off meds and uses homeopathy and counseling with great success to deal with patients with mental disorders. We’re playing with fire as we doom more and more people to a life of dependency on drugs that suppress their symptoms but can lead to unstable, suicidal, and violent reactions.

    Glenmullen has seen some of his own patients besieged by suicidal thoughts of “a particularly obsessive quality” after starting Prozac, and says that the Swedish and German equivalents of the Physician’s Desk Reference warn doctors of this potential side effect and provide guidelines for managing it. And, of course, there are so many other drugs like Prozac.

    John in Seattle

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